„I do understand that things are unfair as human beings are no human beings –

20.04.2017 Kings daHEIM

however, why can’t things be slightly less unfair than they are.”*

The journey to Tuzla – April 10-17, 2017

“My grandma loves flowers so much,” says Melisa.
“My mother loves flowers so much,” says Mata.

If there was a flower for every tear she cried, the world would be a sea of flowers. Climbing up the mountain to see her, would be like walking over a huge carpet of flowers, sweet with fragrance and full of petals and leaves, to a place where hope is synonymous with “Germany.”

Passers-by would admire those cascading plants on her balcony and ask her: “Zineta, can I have a flower, please.”

Now, the only thing floral in her life is the pattern on the skirt, she wears on Easter Day to honor us. And the imprint on the plaid, airing over a rope in the courtyard. There is a huge pile of fabric in her mother’s living room, with another plaid on top, folded and quilted. Those two plaids are Zineta’s bed. At night, she spreads the bigger one on the floor, to cover herself with the other one. This is where she sleeps, ever since the came back from Germany to that mountain, surveying the old town of Tuzla**, as one would expect.

Once, Zineta was young and even happy at times. The building, memorizing the lightness of being she felt back then, is still there – however, war turned it into a ruin. It was the old movie theater where she fell in love for the first time. They would go three times the week.

Zineta pays no attention to those slices of pizza displayed at the snack bar. She lets her eyes wonder over women’s shoes, set up in a shop’s window. “Pick which ever ones you like,” is what her father had said, when she had passed her school leaving exams. It seemed, as if the eldest of his five daughters had made it: that step into a better life, the young Romni*** was to make in those brand new brown shoes with pointed toe-caps, she had chosen after careful examination. The heel measured 4,5 centimeter.

“Take whatever pleases you. Take two of each.” Mata had been reluctant when her mother said that. She knew Zineta had barely enough money to make a living. It was exactly what Zineta had felt when her father had offered the same. Mata was heavily pregnant at the time. 16 years old, she had let pregnancy and the growing child happen.

Zineta wanted her grandchild to have a good start into life. They filled a basket with basic equipment: two little pants, two little shirts, and a tiny white hat on top.

Safe and secure in her grandmother’s arms - who happened to be her nurse - the baby grew up to become Melisa. A few years ago, Zineta became Melisa’s custodian.

MELISA`S SONG

Who cares

Who cares

No house

Who cares

No sun

Who cares

No bed

Who cares

No food

Who cares

I cried

Who cares

I just want Melisa to go to Germany. It does not matter if I go or not.” All vital force seems to have left Zineta. No more lust for life. Over and again she would go into her house, holding a rope. However, it is hard to hang oneself without a roof truss. Finally, she would drink toilet cleaner. She drank the poison but it was without effect.

There are no flowers growing out of her tears. They add to the salt in the ground on the hill of Kalevici above the city.

* Elisabeth in "Faith, Hope, and Charity," Ödön von Horvath

** „Tuzla“ means salt refinery. When young, Zineta worked in salt production.

*** Roma (plural male, sometimes rom; singular male: rom, singular female: romni, plural female: romnija) is the generic term for a population group; they have a language, the indonaric Romanes and presumably a historical and geographical heritage in common.

**** Schupo in " Faith, Hope, and Charity," Ödön von Horvath


Als wär das alles ganz normal - Ostersonntag vor Zinetas Haus

Zineta hat Börek zubereitet und serviert Bosnischen Käse

Früher eine einzige Pracht.

Keine Aussicht - Der Blick von Edis, Zinetas Sohn, verliert sich in der Leere. Stundenlang verharrt er bewegungslos, sucht das Gleichgewicht an der Wand.

Provisorisches Gemach: Zineta und Melisa versuchten sich nach ihrer Rückkehr im Haus einzurichten. Es gibt keine Heizung, keinen Strom, kein Wasser, keine Toilette.

Trauer um das verlorne Heim.

Tvrtko I. Kotromanić (* 1338; † 10. März 1391) regierte von 1377 bis 1391 als erster König von Bosnien. Unter seiner Herrschaft wurde Bosnien zum mächtigsten Staat auf der westlichen Balkanhalbinsel, zu dem auch weite Teile Serbiens und Dalmatiens gehörten. (wikipedia)

Im Schatten der Erinnerung

An die Hauswand gelehnt: Tena, Sandrietta, Melisa, Sara - Die Cousinen von Melisa sind zu Besuch in Bosnien. Sie haben Aufenthalt in Deutschland erhalten.

Dachil und Melisa - Sie wünschte sich ihn als Vater

Zineta

Zubrot zum Lebensunterhalt: Die Familie verkauft Kleidung und Schmuck auf dem Flohmarkt.

Hintere Reihe: Edissa, die Zwillingsschwester von Mata, Dachil, Melisa, Mata, barbara, Larissa, Tena | Vordere Reihe: Elvis, Zineta mit Emilio Sandro, Sara, Sandrietta

Dachil, Melisa, Sandrietta

„Ohne Glaube, Liebe, Hoffnung gibt es logischerweise kein Leben. Das resultiert alles voneinender“. ***